Monday, March 24, 2008

SD Zoo...finally....oh and aol SUCKS!



I've tried....again. Why won't it work???


I haven't post here. Maybe because I tried to post that video and couldn't figure it out and ended up getting pissed off and saying FUCK IT! Portland has given me step by step instructions to do it, he's so wonderful, but I don't want to try it yet. Maybe later this week. My vacation seems to be slipping away and I'm sad about it. I don't want to go back to work...even though I saw a student today at Walmart and it made me miss the kids! But not the daily grind. I like having dinner ready at 5:30! I like sleeping until 7:30! Feel sorry for me, please! Things around here have been pretty good. Just the normal ups and downs of Teendome with The Boy. We had a pretty major incident yesterday (on EASTER!!) that left me in tears. Mr. Newman and Mom were pretty great about it and gave me some good advice. I'm lucky. If I were Newman, I would be RUNNING FOR THE HILLS! But he's hanging in there. He left again for Big Bear this week. Maybe not the whole week though. Sigh. Last night he told me that his mom and g-mom would be by to pick up the ring that his g-mom gave to him to give me as an engagement ring. It had/has a funky setting that really isn't "me" so he wanted to have it re-designed to what I wanted. It's been sitting for a couple months. I don't think that either of us are/were ready to "go there." Well, maybe he has other thoughts? They picked up the ring with what I wanted it look like. His mom called and said that it would be done in about 10 days. I don't know what N has in mind. Maybe he's gonna pop the question? It's inevitable. We've talked about tieing the knot before the end of the year. I mean...what the hell are we waiting for? We're not kids. I don't know. If he asks, I'll say yes. No doubts. He's wonderful. I just worry what other people will/would say because it's so soon. Why do I care so much about that??? Shit, he moved in after only three months! And that's very not like me at all. We'll see what happens. I know that I'm crazy about him, and he feels the same way.
Anyway...this week I'll be taking The Boy and his "Not-Girlfriend" ice skating. Then we're having a big slumber party here with one of JT's friends, The Cousin and his friend, and The Boy. I've offered to have one of his friends, but he states that he doesn't have any friends. Sigh. This coming from the child that says that the only place that he is happy is at school....with his friends.

Monday, March 17, 2008

On Deck

Oh how I love Spring Break. Well, any break actually. Mr. Newman got up at the ungodly hour of 3:45 and was on the road at 4:15. I fell right back to sleep until 7:30. Heaven! He's back in Big Bear, but keep your fingers crossed that it won't be for the whole week.
We rented a grip of movies yesterday and my goal is to get them all watched in a day or two. Tomorrow I'm taking The Boy, JT and The Cousin to The Zoo. I'm really looking forward to that. I'm not sure why I'm all fired up about it. I've not been to the zoo in eons. Looking at their website it seems that they have all kinds of new exibits. I even found a coupon online. I'm very excited! Right now I'm off to watch Margot At The Wedding. Then it's Michael Clayton. I love watching my boyfriend act. Betcha didn't know that GC was my secret BF, did ya?

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Two Steps

I swear it's two steps forward, three steps back with The Boy. I've spoken to friends who've been down this road of Pre-Teen/Almost-Teen. They all said it was worst, but seemed to get better when they got into High School. I'm worried that he may not last that long as I can forsee his untimely demise! Yesterday he and Mr. N spent some "quality" time together, and then today we all went to the movies. The Boy and Mr N saw some sort of PG-13 fighting movie (I can't remember the name) and JT and I went and saw the Spiderwich Chonicals (highly recommended if only for the special effects). All was well until The Boy decided that since I wouldn't kick down $10 for yet ANOTHER hat, he was going to say something mean. When I said that what he had told me hurt my feelings and if it made him feel better to do that? He said "yes." Ouch. I guess this is just the first of many. But it still sucks. If you had told me even a year ago that my sweet boy would be acting like this I would have laughed out loud! Surely not MY BOY! But here he is. Rude and ugly when you least expect it. He continued like this for the rest of the afternoon. I'm sick of the rest of us walking on eggshells wondering what will set him off. I just don't know what to do. I know that there are huge changes in his life, but I thought I raised him better than to be so....ugly. Wake me when he's 20, would ya? Oh wait...just about then is when JT will going through the EXACT SAME THING!!! Wonderful. Something to look forward to!!!
Good thing that Mr. N is so wonderful and has such a calming charm over me. Or I would maybe just be drunk all the time!
What? I'm kidding!!!

Saturday, March 15, 2008


After a week of very nice springtime weather, It's probably going to snow. Actually, it did snow a little bit ago. And wouldn't you know that it was while Mr. Newman and The Boy were out trail riding! The Boy has been wanting to ride on the trail close to our house for a long time and I loathe trail riding, so we've never done it. Well, along comes Mr. Newman and he's been dying to go out there. So they pick today. My bike was in the shop getting some maintenance done (who knows you were suppose to do that! HA!) and while they were out there the weather starting turning for the worse. Mr. N said that they were pretty far out and it was coming down pretty good. But they had fun, and I'm sure that it was something that they won't forget. It's times like that you always remember. We've been on hundreds of desert trips and they all tend to blend together, but we'll always remember the time we went to Glamis and it POURED rain. They boys rode all weekend. The adults stayed in the trailer and did shots of tequila! Maggie was just a puppy and my friends let her camp out in their trailer, too...seeing as we couldn't stay in the tent. The last day we were there the sun finally came out and it was beautiful. I'll never forget that trip. All the trips are fun, but that one stands out. And that's how this ride today will be for my two guys. JT and I stayed home and made chocolate chip cookies. That was fun, too!
Tomorrow we're going to the movies. Mr. N and The Boy are going to see some teenage movie and JT and I are going to see the Spiderwich Chronicals. I'm seeing The Boy and Mr. N starting to bond a little bit more. I like that.

Friday, March 14, 2008


I'm so happy that we have two weeks off. We don't really have any plans. Mr. Newman thinks that he's going to have to go back to Big Bear next week. Damn. I wonder if he'll let me go with him for a few days. I'm sure there are some good antique shops that I can get lost in for a few days. We'll see.
Rumor has it that it's suppose to snow on Sunday. And today we'll be having 40mph Santa Ana winds. Lovely. I don't mind the snow, but I loathe the wind. It usually isn't that bad at my house, but out at work it howls. Makes for not-so-much-fun driving conditions.
I got The Boy's weekly monitor yesterday. He's seems to be pulling his head outta his ass in most classes. At this rate he may be able to squeak out a 3.0 by the end of the year. As of right now he's barely pulling a 2.5. He's lucky that the Honor Roll Field Trip that he's going on today is based on last semester's grades. He had to do a 3D cell model for Science. He did a jello cell with candy. It came out kinda cool. He got an A+. I still won't sign him up for football until he's doing better. Hopefully that is motivation enough for him. When I asked him why he let his grades tank in this first grading period he said that he was trying to be cool. I asked him how that was working out for him. His answer, "Not so well." I hope that he realizes that the "cool" kids will be the ones that took school seriously. I hope that this happens before he's 35.
Now I'm off to make him breakfast and see him off. Then it's waking up JT and griding out this last day.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008


How do I know if anybody is reading. Are you??


It's been a whirlwind few days. Yesterday we had our site validation. We didn't get the official word if we'll be a DS, but they did say we were doing everything that we said we were. The said that our Intervention groups were incredible. I don't do Intervention, but it's something new that we do and so nice to have it validated. They also specifically addressed the ASP saying that they the program was impressive. They liked that we do homework help during the first hour. They thought it taught the kids good study habits. They also said that they were impressed with the enrichment activities that we, gardening, beading. It was HUGE for me, personally, that they addressed this specifically. After they left we all kind of sat around and re-capped the whole process. We were all abosolutely spent. One teacher said it was like a wedding. All this work and build-up for the Big Event and then utter extaustion after. But it's worth it. We have a great school and now the rest of CA will know, too! Amazing.
In other news, I've had a sick child in the house. JT woke up the night before last with a raging fever. 103. Yikes! I was up with him for three hours. Not good when you have a huge day at work the following day. But we rallied. I couldn't stay home with him, obviously, so The Boy stepped up and stayed home with him. He did a good job.....but the massive guilt trip he layed on me wasn't cool, or factual. He said that I never take care of him or give him medicine when he's sick! That I just tell him to suck it up and leave him alone! This is total bullshit. He may stay at home by himself now, but I definitly didn't leave him when he was 8! I was a work-at-home mom when he 8! Good lord. As for not medicating him when he had a fever? Well, that's just stupid. It's getting exhausting. He's contantly telling me that I do more for JT than I do for him. That he gets in more trouble then JT...and on and on and ON! I told him last night at I hear what he's saying and I'll try to do more for him one on one, but his accusations aren't 100% true. I know that perception is reality. I get that, I do. I also know that it's hard for him to share me when he's had me all to himself for the last 12 years. I'm trying to find the fine line here between giving him the love and attention he needs, as well as giving love and attention to an 8 year old boy that's never had a mom. This is going to be a whole lot of work, I guess. I'll just take it a day at a time. Give them both lots of hugs and love. Remind them that we've all wanted to be a part of a family our whole lives. Well, boys. Here it is. It's gonna be work, but I think it's worth it.
Now, if Mr. Newman would finish up his job out of town so I don't have to try to do this alone and over the phone!
Other than that. Things are good. JT is home one more day. I'm home taking care of him. Friday is our last day before break and I can not wait! Mr. Newman will be home on Friday and I'm looking forward to that more than break. He still doesn't know if he'll have to go back next week. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that he doesn't. I'm starting to forget what it's like to him have him home. I don't like that.
We'll muddle through all this. Nothing that a lot of faith (and vodka!) can't cure. haha.

Monday, March 10, 2008


I really don't care much for this time change. Yes, it's nice that it's darker later in the evening, but that just means that we go to bed later. And waking up in the dark. YUCK. I could drag my sorry ass outta bed until almost 6:30 this morning. That's just unacceptable.

Sunday, March 9, 2008


What a great weekend. We got lots done and spent lots of time together as a family. We had JT's brother spend the night. He's an interesting kid. He's four years older than JT and therefor had four additional years of their mother fucking with his head. What a mess. But it was good for me to see that my two boys are really pretty great. Saturday night Mr. Newman and I went over to friends and had a few laughs. I've learned that it's NOT a good idea for me to drink tequila. Ever. Nothing bad happened, but it seems that I don't have a sensor on my mouth. Today we went to The Boy's big Little League Fundraiser. He didn't want to go, but it was cool to do something like that as a family. Wow. I've always wanted a "family". I know that it's not always going to be rainbows and puppydogs, but for right now?'s pretty great. Now I'm off to watch a movie with my boys.

Friday, March 7, 2008


What a difference a day makes. The kids are just great today. Fun and funny to be around. Sweet and considerate. This is why I love my job.


TGIF! Seriously. I was up with the boy until about 10pm helping him study for his spelling test. It took awhile, but he finally got them all correct. Hopefully he'll do well and get anything but the F that has been typical of spelling tests this past month. In other good news, Mr. Newman will be coming home. He's been working out of town all week. I miss him when he's gone. He'll be leaving again next week, but at least we can live in domestic bliss for two days. Work will be hetic until the 11th. We have the Distinguished School committee coming to validate everything on our application. What a long, hard, and rewarding process this has been. I think we'll get it. It's amazing to be a part of this. Our school was one of the worst in our district with the worst reputation. That was five years ago. Look at us now! Only 20 points away from being an 800 school and one visit away from being Distinguished. So cool.

Thursday, March 6, 2008


I've heard that Blogger sucks. It said it lost my orginal post, so I rewrote it.....then it published it.


my head hurts. What do you do with a 12 year old boy that can't see that the lack of attention to his school work today will hurt him when he's in high school? I don't know what to do to get through to him. He's surrounded by equally apathetic kids at school. I'm concerned for him. I want a better life for him than I had. Which means college. Which means doing well in Middle School so he'll get into good classes in high school. I don't know how to motivate him and hollering at him doesn't seem to do much good. Where did my sweet, mild mannered boy go?
AND!!! The damn dogs figured out a way to break into the cat food and now I have to go BACK out to the store to buy more!
My word. Work is hard sometimes. The attitude of a sixth grade child can be unbelievable. The arguing! I have no idea how people can work in a middle school. If it wasn't for the sweetness of the little ones, I'd be mental....well, even more mental than I already am! I get so frustrated at times.

Did I get it right

Is this thing working? Did I just get myself into something to zap all the time that I don't have available?